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{Choosing age-appropriate toys that your kids will actually like is not always easy. Using a few child development hints, you can choose items that your kids will love for years}
I’ll be honest–last Christmas we made a big mistake. We bought our boys toys that were bad choices. There’s no sugar-coating it, we just did. We thought we had chose great age-appropriate toys, but looking back, they were not so great.
We had thought about what to get them, but in the end, we sort of caved to last-minute pressure. Although I know the book knowledge about guided play and toddler development, we still chose items that were too much, too short-lived, and not well-chosen.
First, there was the gigantic Lego set that our older son loved, but it was such a task to put it together that he swore never to take it apart again. So now it sits, lonely and untouched, on his dresser. Now, don’t get me wrong, we LOVE Legos in our house. They foster such imagination and build spatial skills like no other toy, but if they are not taken apart and used again, their use becomes limited.
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Then there was the slot car track we thought our younger son would love. He did like it…for about a week. Then the fascination of racing cars with friends or his brother wore off. It took up an insane about of space in our playroom so we dismantled it and it hasn’t been used since.
Does this sound familiar?
Even with all my training in child development, picking toys and gifts for kids is still challenging at times. It’s difficult to balance what they actually want (or what’s trendy) with what you know to be better choices based on your values. We try not to foster too much consumerism in our home, but it is difficult to turn down those pleas for the “cool” toy that all their friends are supposedly getting. As parents, we are often motivated by noble intentions—we want to see those smiles and excitement on our kids’ faces when they open that gift. It’s often hard to remember that those smiles are often short-lived if the gift choice is not made in a thoughtful way.
The Research Behind Toy Fads
Every holiday season there is always a couple of toys that become the “must have” item of the year. I’ve often wondered why this happens, so I did a little digging into the research.
Herd Mentality
As you might expect, our human tendency towards a herd mentality is part of this. Kids want to fit in and if having the coveted item helps them with this goal, it goes to the top of their list. Social psychologists explain that people can’t be experts at everything so they use a short-cut of trusting certain people’s evaluations of items or circumstances. These “influencers” become the people that adults or kids listen to on certain topics. For kids, this might be a good friend or popular kid at school; for adults, this might be a celebrity or trusted friend.
While herd mentality is not always a negative feature of human nature, it can become problematic for kids if it limits their ability to think independently and make their own choices. This is where having a strong-willed child is a real positive. If we parents can foster our kids’ strong-willed nature so they learn to use it in a positive way to resist social pressures, it will be a huge benefit for them long-term.
The Appeal of Novelty
The other main reason why kids love those fad toys is the sheer novelty. All kids, especially our youngest ones, are naturally drawn to things that are original and novel. Without the mental maturity of adults, kids are inherently fascinated by items they haven’t seen before. Combined with the fact that most young kids don’t have great skills at delayed gratification, this novelty soon becomes an irresistible desire.
Age-Appropriate Toys for Each Age
As adults, we have the emotional maturity (at least most of the time) to look past the toy fads and make more thoughtful decisions when purchasing toys for our kids. This is where research can really help us. Surprisingly, quite a few studies have considered the role that specific types of toys have on developing children’s brains and skill development. Here are a few things to keep in mind:
Age-Appropriate Toys for Birth-Age 1
Limit electronic toys. They tend to be overstimulating for babies and they don’t have the brain development to understand all the beeping and flashing. Research has shown that traditional toys foster more interaction with caregivers and promote language development better than electronic toys.
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- Traditional baby toys we love
Board books are key. Little ones LOVE the sound of your voice. In fact, you are an infant’s best “toy” by far. Research tells us that certain books help foster language development more readily than others. Any reading, however, is great for babies’ brains.
Age-Appropriate Toys for Toddlers/Preschoolers (2-4)
Foster pretend play. All that dress-up play, playing grocery store and doctor’s office is wonderful for young kids’ developing brains. Pretend play is one of the best ways to help kids develop social-emotional skills since they have to stay “in character” and model the emotions of another person.
Little versions. Kids at this age love to copy the actions of adults in their lives. This is wonderful for skill building and social-emotional skills as well. Foster this type of play by choosing kid-size versions of adult tools—toy vacuum, mops, rakes, cleaning tools, play kitchens, and even kid-size tools are all great for this type of play.
Focus on basic skills. Toddlers are still learning some basic eye-hand coordination skills like pouring, filling and stacking. Help this aspect of development by choosing toys that encourage these skills. Items like blocks, pitchers, and sand-water tables are all great examples of toys that foster basic skills.
oh i love the kindness elves recommendation thank you!