Olympic Sports: The Parent Edition

Inspired by this story that discussed “new” winter sports, I began to think about how some days parenting young children feels like an Olympic sport, only no gold medals are handed out, at least not tangible ones (smiles and laughs are as close as we get). So in honor of the 2018 games, I’ve thought of a few parent-tested, everyday Olympics feats:

1. The Vacuum Baby-Soothing Prance: vacuum floors of the house while a fussy infant is strapped to your chest in a baby carrier. A little taxing on the back, but a test of the arm muscles and endurance. My hubby was a gold medalist in this one. Risk: crying may ensue when vacuum noise stops.

2. One-Arm Dinner Eating while Breastfeeding: attempt to use a fork or spoon to eat dinner while holding breastfeeding baby in the other arm (often complicated by nursing cover or gawking onlookers). Sorry guys, only ladies field this team. Difficulty increases substantially when using non-favored hand or eating soup. Personally, I ended up avoiding this sport if possible, by eating hand-held foods.

3. The Stroller Lunge: push 40+ pounds of toddler and stroller up a hill or over grass. This one is both a leg strength and endurance test. Extra points are added if it’s above 90 degrees outside or toddler is particularly fussy.

4. Grocery Cart Obstacle Course: push ginormous racing car grocery cart (chosen to appease toddler) around the store trying not to hit objects or people and get everything on the grocery list. This sport is often complicated by an antsy/bored toddler who is singing or making obnoxious noises. Extra points granted for participants who make it to parking lot with groceries intact and toddler not having escaped restraining harness.

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5. The Baby Bounce: sit on a large exercise ball with a fussy infant strapped to your chest in a baby carrier; bounce continuously. This one is a test of endurance mostly, but also some leg and ab strength. Gold medalists will ensure that baby is sound asleep before stopping bouncing.