The Thoughtful Parent

A blog that makes child development approachable.

Seeing Your Child’s Behavior as Communication and Why This Matters for Parenting

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This free guide, 'Developmentally Appropriate Expectations for Behavior,' provides research-backed examples of what behavior to expect from children at different ages. Specifically, it covers when you can expect children to know how to share, understand others’ emotions, sit patiently, and more.
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Frequently Asked Questions

1 Why does my child behave in certain ways, including misbehavior?

Child behavior, including what parents might see as misbehavior, always happens for a reason and is a form of communication. The page explains that behavior can stem from a child's developmental stage, a lack of emotional maturity, or an attempt to meet a legitimate need based on their learning history.

2 How can I better understand what my child's behavior is communicating?

To understand your child's behavior, it's helpful to consider different perspectives. The page suggests looking at whether the behavior aligns with their developmental stage, if it's due to a lack of emotional maturity in managing big feelings, or if they are trying to fulfill a learned need from their environment.

3 What are the main reasons behind challenging child behavior?

Challenging child behavior often has underlying causes. These can include a child not yet reaching certain developmental milestones, an inability to manage strong emotions due to a lack of emotional maturity, or the child attempting to meet a legitimate need based on their past experiences and learning.

4 Does understanding the 'why' of behavior help with parenting?

Yes, the page emphasizes that understanding the 'why' behind child behavior is crucial for parents. Gaining insight into the reasons for behavior can offer great insight and provide parents with better tools to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively, even if the behavior seems baffling.